Have You Ever....

Have you ever been urged to the point that it felt like pressure?

I have.

I had been toying with the idea of moving but asked myself why? Then it started to hit. I had been able to attend activities with the class and it was being said to me on a regular basis "You just need to move to Lafayette." I'm sure it was meant to be an urging but to me I felt a little pressured. I was not sure of what I wanted to do. Then it kept being brought up to me to move in with someone. I really did not know this person nor did they really know me. I had my reservations. I was still feeling this "pressure" (urging) to move to the area and in with someone. Yes, I know that I could have said no and made my own decisions on this matter, but don't they call it peer pressure? I wanted to move so that I could be more involved because you just cannot be involved when you live far away. I took advantage. I still look back and ask why did I even make the move. I have gotten more involved but along the way I have hurt many people. I have to remember that words can be said to mean one thing but can be taken out of context by the hearer. Unfortunately this is how gossip happens and gossip hurts. I never meant to hurt the roomie because that was so not my intentions. I was not out looking for attention because I do not need it. I do not want to be the focus of any gossip and I don't want the roomie to be the center of gossip either. I did find out that I enjoyed living out "on my own" again and that I had a time of growth that I need my own space. Not that I don't have my space here at the house, but I mean to be the head of my own place at least until God brings me my future spouse if that is my future. Anyone who has ever had a roommate can at least in a sense understand to a tenth of a degree about that. I need to choose and use my words more wisely. I have got to understand that what I am trying to say may get taken out of context and twisted to something as far away as what I am actually saying. I need to learn to review in my head what I am going to say and make sure that it actually means what I want it to mean.

To this I owe my deepest apologies to anyone I may have hurt. I ask of your forgiveness.

If this does not make sense to anyone or you are confused and before anything else should happen let me know..give me a call or drop an e-mail. No more out of context thoughts please. We need to have everything clear.